Iconography

A year has gone by, we have had the flowers, the funeral, that bloody song, a museum, a concert with Cliff 'n' Elton, several forests worth of books and articles, and we've even had the margarine. What we haven't had is any sign of the Diana cult dragging itself to a halt.

If that wasn't bad enough, the parasites of the legal profession have had their noses firmly in the trough and John, "The Y-Fronts Kid" Major, has got himself onto the charity committee. Some bright spark has even suggested that Mandy Mandelson's 40ft high "Millennium Woman" should, in a totally sexless way, be modelled on Saint Diana of Kensington.

But this isn't as low as you can go: you've got to go to Paris, to the Left Bank, to the Odeon Hotel for that.

Di hard

The bright spark who runs that jolly little establishment has come up with the most mind-blowingly tasteless bit of Dianamania since some brain dead conspiracy theorist suggested that Phil'n'Liz had her bumped off for consorting with an Egyptian. What he has done is become the first person to organise Diana Death Tours.

They're free to hotel residents, but a steep Althorp and a Half (that's fifteen quid to the uninitiated) to anyone else and they give the seriously macabre thrill seeker the chance to trace Diana's last hours from the comfort of a minibus. You get to visit "the scene of the last supper", the famous thirteenth column of the Pont D'Alma underpass, to lay flowers at the impromptu shrine and, finally, to drop by the hospital where she died. The real Dianaphiles could probably arrange to stop for a quiet supper at the Ritz before leaving by chauffeur driven Mercedes, seat belts and drunk driver optional.

Dead wood

Nothing can quite match the sheer tackiness of death cults like these and this latest piece of tastelessness must surely rank alongside "The World Famous Dead Hollywood Film Stars Tour" and the unbelievable "Elvis Presley Death Experience" in the pantheon of crass kitsch. With the anniversary of her death upon us, perhaps now is the time to show a bit more taste and let her rest in peace on her island at Althorp whilst the rest of us get on with our lives.